Unintended
by rbs89
Summary: A prequel to "Walking Her Home". A BBC North &South fic. What were John's thoughts as Higgins told him that 'he was her brother? Please R&R!


A/N: People really wanted a sequel to "Walking Her Home". Well, I wouldn't call this a sequel, more like a quickie whilst I procrastinate at uni. The song "Walking Her Home" by Mark Schultz inspired the first story. This one is inspired by Muse's "Unintended", which is a prequel of sorts to "Walking Her Home". Once again, it's following the BBC's adaptation of North and South.

Enjoy! And please leave a comment.

**Unintended**

"_He was here brother"_

The words "Spain" and "brother" ran over and over in John Thornton's mind, not quite comprehending that he had been wrong- that she was unattached and the face of his worst nightmares was in fact her brother.

As much as he desired to go directly to London, he knew he couldn't go to her just yet. He had to rein in his emotions and compose his thoughts before he inundated her with words that would either cause him to be the happiest man alive, or to be the most unfortunate man to live. His worst fear, upon seeing Margaret, would be to find her engaged to some man, like the git, Henry Lennox, and being absolutely in love with him.

Looking into himself, he realised that the women he had pursued- Anne Latimer- was nothing in comparison to the sweet, naive and innocent Margaret, for he knew that young ladies who were sent away to finishing their education were well versed in the arts of attracting wealthy men with many desirable connections. He only chose Anne after he had been so quickly dismissed- his pride in tatters- and he had to know whether or not he was good enough for anyone. Her attentions to him had been vulgar in comparison to Margaret's silent grace and disapproval. Oh, how he wished he hadn't rebuffed him when she had told him she had though well of him. If only he had allowed himself to hear her sincerity, and hope… but he knew he was justified in what he had done, for no one knew it was her exiled brother.

Indeed, he saw himself as a businessman first, a son second, and it had never entered into his thought that he was undesirable- for he had one of the most prosperous mill owners in Milton, a magistrate, and the best- and only- son to his mother, for without her, he would not have had the opportunities he had been given and embraced with his perseverance and quick and logical mind.

He locked the mill for the night- it would be one of the last time he would do this, for in less than a week, his mother and himself would be moving to one of the smaller houses in Milton which were more appropriate for a man of his position. He would give up his magistracy, and would begin again, this time as an apprentice of some sort. He only hoped is master would be fair and cared for the wellbeing of his workers as he had, but suspected not.

When he arrived home, he was greeted by an obvious look of relief on his mother's face, for it was not the first time in her life that she had faced financial failure. The last failure came at the cost of her husband, and her greatest fear was that John would become like his father. Ironically, this failure was not caused by speculation, but from the lack of one.

Hannah Thornton had spent the afternoon in great fear that John's pride would not be able to withstand the battering like his father. Both had been proud, but unlike her husband, John was capable of great feeling, and she knew his heart had not been untouched by Margaret's refusal or later scandal involving an unknown young man in the dead of night. His whole demeanour had changed. He was more reserved than ever, more likely spending the night on his desk than in his bedchambers. His temper would easily be set off, particularly around Fanny, who's selfishness and disregard was a direct result of her and her brother shielding her- protecting her- from society's vicious tongue after her father's death.

And Fanny had repaid him with her selfish pride. No sisterly affection or concern, like Margaret and the lengths she would have gone to protect her brother.

Hannah was at a loss to how she should approach her own son. She had never been the overbearingly affectionate type, and sensed that nothing she could do would alleviate his currently depressed state. Yet she was concerned, and ensured that his tea was warm and the port was at his disposal, even though she knew he abhorred those who drank until they had little to no control over their body.

John felt smothered by his mother's concerns.

He loved her dearly, but she didn't understand his heart, how his heart would not allow him to forget Margaret, even now when she was in London and he was in Milton. Could she not understand it? He would never have employed Higgins if Margaret had not intervened, and told him that he was a kind master. Even though he was an excellent worker, and had his heart in the right place, commerce was about one thing: profit. Like the marriage market, connections were also highly regarded, but it always came down to money.

He had to escape.

He had to get away from the business of Milton.

His heart cried out for him to go to London, but he knew that once he got there, he would be unable to leave without seeing her at least once.

And then perhaps, he might

Helstone.

He remembered how ardently Margaret defended the south, and Mrs Hale's desire to be back where she had been known and was comfortable in. Even Dixon, the impertinent maid, had more than once compared "dirty Milton" to the tranquillity of Helstone.

So, it was Helstone he would go.

Unable to sleep in the night, he arose before anyone else in the household, and left a note for his mother, telling her not to worry, and that he would be coming back. He knew regardless that she would worry after him until he came home.

Unable to contain himself, he ran to the station, impatient to be at the place his beloved loved.


End file.
